Body of Lies

I caught this on Thursday.

It was fantastic. The last time i enjoyed a movie that much was V for Vendetta. Thumbs up for Ridley Scott.

while getting the above pics, i seen bad reviews as well as good. Guess not everyone shares the same taste as me.

But i truely enjoyed this. Every minute of suspense as each party tries to outwit the other. Layers and sublayers of truths, lies. Believe no one and deceive everyone- the tag line.

Why do we let differences separate us? Underneath that exterior, arent we all the same? Why kill others at the expense of your own people? Does the end justify the means?

I'm off to dinner. I know i'm abrupt.

i'm on mc, because of my infected tooth and swollen cheek, pretty much like a chipmunk, only uglier.

What better things to do than post pictures of my recent trip to genting. Sadly, yc was able to predict i was in genting when i just said i'm back from malaysia. I hate to think i'm that predictable, but hey, believe it a not, it's been two years since i last step on that moutain.

i feel strange cos i was uploading my pictures.---*I've tried classifying my new portable hard disk* so i've divided my portable to 3 classifications under the year 2008.

a) Personal
b) Family
c) Work

Oh, do let me know if anyone has better idea to classify their portables. Appreciate any tips.

So, its' awfully strange to note, there's so much more events, happenings in the Family Folder. I'm not complaining. In a way, i'm thankful i've such a close-knitted, fun family, but have i neglected other aspects in my life?

It's like, if this portable is to record my life (base on the pictorial memories that i've taken), based on file size, you will note "Family" has taken up more than 65%. My Personal, aka "Friends"+ "Boyfriend+ Self (Pictures with no body, just me phototaking stuffs, strangers)" probably take up 20-30%, and then "Work" (aka colleagues-friends) take up 5%.

Granted that there's many more people in the Personal Folder, the 5 people in my family sure take up a huge space in my life. Haha, pun intended.

I dont think there is such a thing as quota to meet for each sector. In fact, i believe everyone's folders and capacity for each sector is different. It's just an observation i've made, and i pondered upon its significance. What do you think your folders will be like?

Well, ponder question a part. I was walking home with my sister yesterday after my horrendous wait of 6 hours at NDC when she said someone has cut the grass even before we saw any grassland. In return, i asked her how she knew and she said " the smell". Hmm, and behold, she's right, there were traces of grass bits scattered all over the trail home. And then i 've asked: " why is there a smell when grass is cut??? There's no smell when we cut our hair? We do not emit any smell? " And the sister replied.."The smell of dying". !!! i was like, "hmm, smells too good to die".

Picture taken when i was on the tobagan. Something like that. Nice scenery. Cool weather. I would love to have a pinic laid and a good book at hand on the slope.

Anyway, just a conversation which sounds interesting to me. So i thought i jot it down.

Speaking of conversation, i had one with allan few days back when we were at pasta mania. He shared a conversation about him and his pal regarding the financial crisis. How the economy falls into a slump and the gloomy outlook. They each had an interesting view of the economy. One feels that while the mass has suffered, some has probably benefited from it all. Those financial gurus who may/may not have directly started/orchestraed this whole episode.

Another feels, this is altogether a big misfortune for all, the economy on the whole has fallen into a slump and shrunk. A very much diminished realm. And there i was swallowing my pasta, when it occured it's like a debate of whether money/ fortune is conserved! It's like the law of conservation. Energy follows that conservation. So, does Wealth follow that law?

When one gets richer, does he/she get rich in the expense of the other? It sounds logical eh? when stock rise in relative to another, some strike it rich in matters of seconds, while some plummets to poverty with drastic falls of their stocks. Again, matter of relativity. So, i was thinking all these to myself which munching when i told the boyfriend. "Hey, remind me to blog about your conversation!, i'll let you know what i think!" HAHA, and with that, i told him to go read my blog if he wants to find out, which if you ask me, he probably forgotten about it, cos he didnt remind me at all. Bleah.

Okay, that's enough talk about my 'thoughts', now just some pictures/highlights about my trip. i didnt visit the casino which is quite sad cos i would have like to see if luck was on my side. I was nursing a bad toothache and i was hoping bad health=good wealth, but alas, i had no chance to prove that as i was too tired and plonk straight into bed.

the mummy who tries it all. She didnt go casino and wanted to be with her kiddos, despite the fact that when you sum the 4 kids' age you get 90! I love her. The cart further up in front belong to the sister. My baby bro commented the last time she joined us, we were still able to play the kid's slide.

the baby of the family at the top of the world! I took it for him while i was waiting for the boys to finish. This ride took them 1 hour to wait. Feel their impatience?
Want to see their enthusiasm when they got on?

What did i say? Didnt she look sporty? She's a victor man, actually no, she came in 2nd of the pack of 12. Want to see the champion? !!!! Guess who?
It wasnt me. It's my bro who was parked behind my mum. So judging from the angle, yup, i was parked beside my mum. I got chidded for not using my seat belt and using the camera!!!
Christmas time! And check out the cheeky bro. This plant makes good decor. Christmas time, just hang blue, white, decor. Chinese New year time, hang red packets and ornaments, V-day, hang little red hearts and small love letters, Dumpling Festival, hang litte dumpling, you get the picture....

We had ecology lessons as well.

These are mandarin ducks arent they beautiful???I think i gave them a fright explaining the frenzy.

Snakes.Lime green. Dont play.

interaction with racoon.
A magnificent strong horse.

To sum up the trip, this is how i felt at 17.9Deg C in the morning!!!
ignore my utterly dis-tasteful show of belly. This is the best shot the bro could take of us sisters. Me on the other hand, took a equally fantastic shot, displaying my bro's choice of boxers. CK.hiaks! Boo, realize no family shot taken. Sigh, here's a pic of the dad. Hee, fulfilling his dream to become ringmaster. Grrr!!! imagine us kids taking the place of the animals. There you have it. A typical, Zhang's holiday trip.

i told myself i will post pictures up, and frankly, if i dont take the time before dinner to do it, i doubt i will find anytime in the night. Well, basically because the TV will take up my time, and then it will be all groggy after my eyes are strained for at least 2 hours straight.

div>so here goes.


First: celebrating Von Wang's birthday!=) B2, this is specially for you so you will be updated on the squad's activities.



Venue: Iciban @ Novena + Cheeky Chocoloate for Desserts.



We had a great time as usual, but von teng and angie had the best laugh.. Saddest thing, the three of us din know what's so funny that cracked them up in the first place. We laughed because they laughed... without knowing y?!

See what i mean?

That's what they have been doing half the night.






Birthday girl all ready for the camera, while elaine focuses on task at hand





A comfy picture... at a comfy place. Yumyum!

Group Shot!=) missing jeli though...

i shared a wonderful news with the squad that night that i'm getting a pup.. and the i msged them the moment i got it.. and i also smsed them the moment we decided to return it as it was too noisy at night and we were afraid it would disturb the neighbours. ( my neighbour stayed home 24 -7 and we couldn possibly subject her to this..Sadly when we first saw Latte, she was so quiet we didn even hear her make a noise, what a different scenario when it turns dark) .. i did think of not blogging about it at all, cos stil feeling this weird gnawing feeling of guilt inside me.

But, i think it's for the best. My brother is not handling it too well, apparently he wants to get it back, so it's kinda like a lit family "dispute" now. Not really dispute but it's something dangling there.

So here's the pup. I love her. I even gave her a name "Latte". However, she's really still a baby and she really needs lotsa attention. She craves for company in the middle of the night, so you have to stick with her before she turns in to zzz or she will start whimpering and then it's barking.. Well, here's a shot of Latte. My latte.

My latte walking

High 5...tired after all the hype.

full frontal.

i miss her.

random sights of singapore

love the picture overall
love the clouds
love the greens
the infamous icon of Singapore.
love the street lamps

Tuesday with BedSheets

Yup, i wanted to blog about this. Actually i' probably be blogging everyday this week. So, i've changed bedsheets today (tuesday), thanks to my sister's nagging that i've never changed the bedsheets alone.

So, here i am, woke up with totally frizzled look, wondering where the bedsheets are kept while i made my way to the bathroom to wash up.

I made a couple of errors, wild guesses, before finding them in my parents' room. "So, what's the big deal? i thought... Changing bedsheets.. Chey!" thinking my sister made too big a hoo-ha about me not changing them. The last time i did, was with my sister when we first moved in, and once more with allan when i bought new bedsheets which i was so proud of. So, yeah, i've never really changed them alone for the past 1 year, it's always been mei mei doing the job.

So, i start.

*

*
*

How to start?

I was thinking to myself, do i strip everything off before changing them, or do i change them along the way? And where do u put the pillows, (5 of them. 3 being mine), Bolster ( 1), Quilt (2, 1 each, mine's queen and her's super single) and the old Bed sheets (Queen) while stripping them off ? It's seems unhygenic to put them on the floor? But it seems to weird to pile them on the old bed sheets (which i've rolledup about to wash).. So, i recalled.. amazingly. St John, When i was doing my nursing lessons-" how to change bedsheets". HAHAHAHA!!

So, after some haphazards manoeuvres (half-half), i've managed to change all of them!!! Boy, nobody mentioned changing bedsheets requires arms of steel (Yeah, to me), all the flipping making sure all corners of the quilt gets the quilt covers, (yeah, i made the mistake of criss-crossing the quilt and the covers) holding up the thick mattress so you can tuck in the bedsheets neatly. pulling the bolster case out of the bolster, i think i took a whole half an hour to clear and change them. Let's not forget the back muscles required when you stretch and bend your back. AHHH....

it's a workout alright. And at the end....TADAH

Somehow, i feel this picture doesn do me justice.

and just when think that's the end of it, there's the mammoth washing to do! My mum was amazed, when her 26-year old daughter doesn know how to operate the new washing machine since we've gotten about 11 months back. So much for giving myself away, the level of commitement to household chores i do.

Hee, thanks sis. I din know you've been working out so hard.

A morning in Starbucks

Copied off my notebook:

It's 10.37 am and here i am at Starbucks at Compasspoint on a weekday cool morning. Listening to my ipod- "things will go my way" by The calling. I'm fortunate to get a cushion seat (there's not many to start with) and i have a book on my lap and my tall Java chip on my table. =)
This is something i've always wanted to do.


I've just finished breakfast with my mei mei and she treated me to Macs and she's now off to work while her sis is slacking away in Starbucks. What a great way to start the morning! Though i must say this was not how i quite envisioned today to start. I had plans to either go to the beach (ruined by the rainy weather) or declutter my portable hard disk( a task which i'm not exactly looking forward to), but i guess this is what people do on their break, or convince themselves to do when they have the time-- settle errands which seems awfully tedious and wasted for a weekend.

Well, my sister interrupted my plans when she woke me up from my freshly changed bed-sheets (yes, i will blog about that.. Tuesday is BedSheets day) & jioed me for breakfast, with today being her last day at work.

pls: by the way, saw this one guy outside starbucks who's just people watching, with a cup of coffee in his hands. Oh, he got up and left with no bag, papers or stuffs. Cool!

People outside are carrying brollies (plural of brolly?) and leaves are swaying so hard i think it's probably cooler out there and here i am, trying to act snuggly in my oversized sweater indoors with aircons not fully functioning...

Actually the purpose of me coming out alone today is to think. Dont think it's possible to think properly at home without any form of distractions. e.g (at this point of writing, my mum called to ask if i needed a lift home and then i told her i'm at starbucks reading .. & she's
Wah! oKAY, take your time..)"

So where was i? Oh yeah, to think! i think i dont have a particular agenda, just letting my thoughts run wild, letting them internalized, in the midst of the incessantt blending of the coffee beans and Abba's droning in my ear drums. Another reason why i'm here at Starbucks is beacuse i want to read my book " financial securities in troubled time", a very apt title (if u ask me) especially in these few peculiar weeks.

Something tells me i'll fall sleep if i were to read this in bed, i probably wont last past chapter 1..Wait no, make that introduction. So, i aim to read this after this entry. Gosh, this internalization of thoughts sure aint easy...

"if" is playing on my ipod now, i think it suits my current mood as i people watch. Think i'll stop my ranting to enjoy the moment.

Signed:

hooey@ 11.07 am (corner at starbucks)

PP/S at a much later time--->: i finished reading the whole book!!!! i'm proud to tick off this item-->

"read a whole book at a coffeejoint, people watched in a weekday morning"

Essentials for a 2+ hour in a coffee joint.

A question to ask Donald Duck

I'm heading out in a while to go borrow some books, with no idea what i feel like reading. Just want to spend sometime in solitude with a group of strangers in the library.=)

Just thought before i go, to leave a intriguing question. Something i caught off friends-season 3 i think.

From Chandler Bing;
Ever wonder why, Donald Duck never wear pants, but after he finishes his shower, he will turn up with a towel at his waist. What's the logic?

Hiaks. I love making myself laugh!

Vertical Limit Time-Wise

it's my first day of my 1 week break before i embark on my new job. So, thought since i wont be taking my open water certification this week, i might as well make full-use of my time. Document my week, before i start to lament how this week has passed in futile.

Well, i'm watching "verical limit" as i'm blogging in my parents' room. Man, this show sets the reality of scaling K2. When i was in secondary 3, i think climbing mt E was the hype and everyone was dreaming, "making plans" of how they want to scale that some day. "Kids? with limitless imagination?"=)

As i watched, my desire to climb isnt that great anymore. I still think it'll be great to climb a snow moutain... stay at base camp with hot choco, with a fire eating bbq food. Using ropes and caribenas (dunno how to spell), snow hooks, all tucked in big bulky windbreakers, abseiling horizontally and vertically, rock climbing at it's peak. To me, its an experience uncomparable to snow skiiing at ski resort, and given a chance i will definitely want to try climbing.

However, it's not all rosy and red... it's really kinda scary the things you faced, the emotions, with survival instinct so strong at that moment you dont know what kind of person you may evolved to in the face of danger. Will you sit back, and watch others die before you? Or will you rather die first and not face the summits alone till someone finds you.. or not? How will you occupy time, when you no longer have concept of day or night? How you will face the world of white blanket when everything is so cold, so dry and so quiet?

Will you want your loved ones to find you knowing they may sacrifice themselves in doing so ? Or will you still want to see them, for fear of never saying a proper good-bye? never letting them know how much they mean to you?

Boy, in our world, things are awfully stable we seem to worry senselessly. Dont you think? Or maybe it's just the show.

When you're late 20s, you start thinking plans, and nope, it's not plans of magnitude like where to head this holiday, or where you and your friends would like to study, which concert is good, which mobile phone is the latest on the market that you like to grab hold of... Maybe you do, but inside, there's the gnawing feeling of how you want to live your life. At least for me, will you be thinking of settling down in the next 2 years? Will you start a family after you hit 30?

Or, do you want to accomplish certain things before you get married?

like..

Are there places you want to go, things you want to do before you start family commitments? For a start, climbing everest?=) backpacking with your pals? Travelling to Bhutan, go northpole to take picture? Staying in a foreign land for a few months? Or, will you want to advance in your career? Hit a certain income bracket per annum? Get that car you've always dream of. Build up your investment portfolio?

I've always think the choices are limitless and 20's is the best time to do whatever you want to do. Yes, you have the money to do what you want (if u save enough), you do not have the commitment tied to you as yet, you can get the time if you utilise your annual leave appropriately... but, are the above plans contradictory to one another? Are you able to carry them all SIMULTANEOUSLY?

Sadly, no matter how i see it, i dont think it can be done, it seems rather exclusive to me as time is a common factor. Time is the equalizer to all rich or poor, healthy or sick, powerful or simple. Time, once passed will not revert. And certain choices, once you've made them, comes with a certain price and achievement, depending on how you worked at it.

So 20's is a time of unlimited choices, and paths you can choose to embark. Of course you can do this anytime.... not only your 20's, 30's, 40s.. stretching to even 50's 60's, but now, is the golden period, it's when everything is in abundance. It's usually is, if you have the luxury of time and youth.

So, what's your choice?

More than just a Match

This calls for a special post, a special dedication as we await 48 years. I mean singapore waits 48 years. I've only waited 26 years, but that's pretty long anyway. It's long enough for me to take pictures of the special event. Hey peeps, you wont see these pics anyway in the mag.. cos i took them personally.. haha, off the TV.

Since when have you seen the word "singapore" beside the medal icon??

Hardly a picture perfect of the three medalists, but nevertheless a perfect team.

I have to admit, i never felt more for my national flag than that moment when i saw it on the screen.


With that, we put Singapore on the ranks of medal tally. With that, singapore scores... in more ways than one.

Beautiful night

few minutes into monday.

And here i am, blogging while waiting for my phone to send some pictures to my lappei for me to upload. Tho i dont think i will be uploading them into this post at night.

The pictures were taken at the lights fest over the weekend held near the national museum. it's quite a refreshing performance, for once, no one had to worry they cant see anything cos they were blocked by humans as most of the performances were up in the air.

One striking sight was this lady playing on the white grand piano which was hoisted up in to the air with another lady dancing like a ballerina. very beautiful sight. Very not-singapore. Haha.

Think it's been ages since we last talked. I missed her.

Feeling the mood

Singapore Flyer+ GSS+ Godmother

i've been shopping. Really shopping, with no intention of really shopping... but just started shopping.

For once, i embraced the true spirit of the Great singapore sale, and joined the dark side- following the patronage of hundreds of sthousands of Singapore ladies as they strutted down the street with shopping bags, looking for the best buys.

I dont really do this, but this year marks such an exception i decided to take down snapshots of show of my good buys... with sales and without sales.

Items which have not been worn...
Tube top from Zara sales $16.90
tOP from zara sales $29.90
shorts from cotton on $19.90

Skirts from ness... no sales=( ($50 plus.. worn already)

zara knit wear sales.. $39.90
*Swallows*, i got this because i got too tired wearing my heels along marina square.. simply cant stand it, and decided to buy a pair of trainers to wear on the spot, much to the amusement of the shop assistants, these will be the 3rd pair of shoes i bought while walking in heels simply because i cant stand the pain.. $113.. after 40% discount.

current read: Organized for success. This book set me $39.26, and that was after a $5 discount somemore... i also ordered another book from Amazon... it's on its way to see me..

Foreground: A hallmark manicure set (handy to carry around) $8.90 after discount.. Got it because i bought a birthday card for allan from there.

Background: a small blue alarm clock.. need it to really wake me up. Handphone doesn work on me anymore.. $22.

Nike sport bra ($48.15 ) and Nike Pants ($84.50) but i got a $60 cash voucher cos the Teochew clan got it for me for my bdae.. and i only used it now.. so i think i stil fork out about.. $60 plus.. darn. aim to use them for my yoga class this month with sister.

yellow zara singlet $9.90 i think....

So there are more, but since i started using them.. i decided not skip. Sigh, i have sinned. I'm broke now, i' guess it's staying home to read my two books., and fittness with my nike suit, and cleaning my nails.

Heee.
btw, no more metal teeth!!! took them off on the 26 june'08!

16 all over again

What a great way to spend monday night? A great way to ease those monday blues...

A sing-out loud session of reminiscing the 90's hits... There i was trying to look through my lists of songs when suddenly decided to play britney's "sometime". this song brought back memories cos i rem standing at HMV with my b2, looking at her mtv, gushing how sweet she looked... and what do u know.. my sister jolted me out of my daze and commented: "Man, that song is like 10 years old.. and britney's a mum of 2 already!"

I was like... "..."

and then the game just started... I play songs of my lappie, and she started guessing the band/artist & song titles.. and we'll just sing out loud... until i start playing the next song for her to guess. and so far this is what we have sang.

1. "sometimes" -britney
2. "If you only knew"-moffats
3. "Like a rose"-A1
4. "Truly Madly, Deeply"- Savage Garden
5. " I wanna be with you"- Mandy Moore
6. " Liquid Dreams"- Otown
7. " Quit Playing Games with my heart"- Backstreet boys
8." Dont make me wait" - 911
9." Because of you"- 98 Degrees
10."Oops i did it again"- Britney
11."Together Again"- Janet Jackson (a hint i gave my sister: the one who bared her nipple)
12." Valentine"- Tina turner
13.""Turn Back time" - Aqua
14."Keep on moving"- 5ive
15. "Dreaming of you"- Selena
16. " That's what friends'are for"- Stevie Wonder & Dione Warwick
17." Graduation" - Vitamin C
18. " Finally found"- Honeyz
19." Only Love" - trademark
20."Never had a dream come true"- S club 7
21." All by myself" - Air Supply
22." All Out of love"- Air supply
23. "There"- Swirl 360** (totally reminds me of jeli)
24. "Tearing up my heart"- nsync
25." Each time"- E17
26." Until the time is through"-5ive

There's more.. but i'll stop at 26. My age. One for each year of my life that i've lived and will continue doing, taking these songs and memories.

Strangely, instead of feeling old listening to these songs, i feel Young!!! Cos i know the lyrics of msot by heart.. i can sing to them.. !!!And that feels really great.. it's like i've been brought to my past.. i'm 16 all over again.

* smiles * what a great way to think of the past....

First leaf falling

Sometimes, u wonder why leaves fall with such ease, painting such a peaceful picture.

Sometimes, u wonder why leaves die as they fall, breathing their last just before they snap and fall

Sometimes, i like to think if a falling leaf falls on my hand when i reached out, my dream comes true.

Sometimes, when you are given something, you wish you din have it.

Sometimes, when things come easy to you, you wished you learnt to hold it as though it's difficult.

Sometimes, when things seem to go wrong, you tell yourself to brace yourself and that it will soon be right.

Sometimes, you want things to stay the way they are, but you know things will never stay the same way, and change is what you ought to adapt.

Today, i went for my like 3rd meeting with my new department. I think it's a highly challenging field, much more into the business aspects, more involved with the management and i guess it's something i'm looking forward and yet afraid. Afraid to screw up, afraid to take that tumble. Afraid to start anew.

H=R/E

Tell me.

How do you know this is what you ever wanted? That you are happy and you will always be??

***************

Read this off a book, someone came up with the mathematical formula of happines= R/E

R: Reality
E: Expectations

To be happier, you either improve your reality or lower ur expectations. Oh, dont ask me what happen if E=0, i belive once ur born into this world, you're bound to have at least some expectations.

No expectation, no happiness, infinity happines= nothingness since it cannot be define. That's how i think i will intepret.

Point is, do you agree?

I shared this over breakfast with my family, and my baby bro aka Youngest bro was like... How can it be measured? This is intangible. Is he true? If we were to put a value to happiness, it can be traded for something of equal value or more.

However, something that used to make u happy may not make u happy in a different time aka reality. As mentioned in the book"19 minutes"

Say u used to be the prestigious few who earns $50,000/mth (in say 10 months ago) and you were happy at that time, 10 months later, you earn $50,000/mth (still within ur expectation) but so is everyone else (reality check), there your happines drop.

so, what makes me happy now, wont neccessary makes me happy in the future, unless i lower my expectations, or improve upon it. It's easier to lower.. but that's commonly camouflaged by the way"contentment". You can say, that's a wimp's point of view for not contending.



*******

By the way, i wanted to compile the answers i've gotten for this question that i posed on MSN.
" What is hard to gain but easy to lose?"
Answers gotten:

1. Money (most common answer)
2. Job/ career
3. Trust
....


i know some will hate me for saying this, but for me: 4. Weight =P

i think i'm missing out some other answers. Do tell me if i forgot to add urs.

Current read

Book at the moment: "19 minutes" by Jodi Picoult

Still reading, still enjoying.

Totally agreed:

"Ms Picoult has carved her own niche with her novels-one part romance, one part courtroom thriller, two parts social commentary- Dallas Morning News"

What a difference a day made

what a difference a day made...

2 interviews, 2 job offers, decide to accept one, back in business.

i will rem this date.

A letter to myself 10 years down the road

it's been some time since i blogged. some of you might have heard what happened to me, some might have guessed having reading my last post. Yup, i'm RE...

Aftermath? Post- thoughts? Having past 2 weeks since i last heard this news, i guess this two weeks have been... now, what's the best word for it?

I've been really conscious about how i felt the past two weeks. This news is something which many of us, especially those around my age dont really experience. Say... you are in your 1st or 2nd job? 3rd the max...minus those part-time, attachments and all.

Conscious because of what reason ? I dont think i have the full answer. I just know, i've been making mental points in my head. Take this week for example, i realize i've been taking out the same blue notebook i have in my bag everyday on the way to work, making a list of things i have/want/hope to do for the day/week, and checking the items out on the next day when i take out the notebook again as i jot down new stuffs. So far, the count is doing good. I dont get 100% checked off per day, but at least everyday, at least one item is checked.

They say "baby steps", they say "dream big", they say "unity is strength", they say " each to his own". Suddenly when everyone, irregardless of their seniority, expertise falls on the same boat with the same situation, an imbalance starts to surface. A very interesting phenomena is noted in the office. Wait, suddenly it's not an office where everyone go about their meeting... It's a forum, where everyone meet to discuss, not about work, not to complain about work.. but rather, the lack of work. I feel an emptiness, at the same time, an exciting anticipating at the new slate of path that might be ahead of me. Experiences were shared as we go around cubicles, gathering little spots to discuss over cup of coffee. Some sharing fond memories they have. Some sharing future plans. It's altogether... a very new thing to me.

To say, everyone took it the same approach is alit inaccurate. Some took it actively to seek new alternatives, some took it leisurely, happy at the chance to rest, to laze (if i should be able to use this work), some moping about, going round to see if there's new information for scoop.

I took abit of everything. This period is what everyone of you working will wish you have the time and resources i have now. I pride myself actually going to company resources self-help to learn about finance, read about negotiation skills while i continue looking at the market trend for openings available. I kinda helped an operator of mine teaching her MS excel, so that she can learn something and hopefully add it to her list of IT skills in resume. Frankly, i always thought i was a bummer at heart, but i din know i was not at all comfortable with wasting my time in office. I actually wanted to do something fruitful. So it was great when i could use the time to help this operator out. This is time, i'm thankful for this period. I had 2 great years in this department and tho it's sad counting down to its last wafer out day (yes, that's a term i have conjured LWO)... i've learnt so much and made great friendships. I'm amazed at my revised resume. hiaks. My manager has kindly reviewed it 3times. yes, it can mean two things, he's really concerned about my future and hence really want me to do a top-notch resume, or i really did a lousy resume.

Sigh, having added all that, i've been "arrowed" into a team to come up with a "closure" (i hate to use that term) souvenir for all of us. the "last arrow" they told me. *sigh*

I'm actually very positive about this whole thing. And to top it all, i've treating myself to little indulgences (yes those sensible friends of mine might shake their head and ask me to save for a rainy day instead).

Take today for example, i rate 4 star ****.
Went for a pedicure with my colleagues during lunch using mich's package deal but we pay her lah. i top up mine with another $4 for footscrub. Yeah, nice feet and toes and toe nails. it's feels equally disguisting and liberating to see that pile of towering dead skins on the towel where my feet rest.

Followed by a pretty fruitful day at work, i went back home, caught abit of "MR DEEDs" on cable. Btw, "the IRon MAN" is amazing! the lousiest thing about the movie was the title was totally under-rated and pushing potential audience away cos the title remains them of "the iron ladies", i gotta admit i was one of those until i watched the show and was totally convinced. Tony Starke is the man. He made us engineers feel proud, and at the same time freaking poor.

Oops, i have yet again diverted. Back to the star-studded day, so i came back home, watched a bit of "mr deed", the meaningful part where adam sandler asked the share holders if they all turned out what they wanted to be when they were little. Nope. I shook my head too, sadly the only difference between me and those share holders... i dont know what i wanted to be when i was little. or did i forget along the way?

I could not shout out loud what i wanted to be when i was little, but i seriously dont think engineer was the word i had in mind when i was 6. 'English' was possibly the closest word to 'engineer' i guess at that age, and i did pretty fine in english, if that was a sign.

Anyway, after the movie, i went for a nice warm shower, still admiring my pretty toes when i pampered myself to some DIY facial regime. Put the "wedding album" on my mini compo and was listening to "fallen" by lauren woods when i started blogging in the comfort of my room. How cool is that?

And now, i've more or less come to the end of my thoughts. It's time to take good night sleep. Beauty sleep is extremely important at this time of my life. First, i'm starting to age, we are aging all the time, but now, it's starting to show physically if we dont take care of ourselves, for example, i hate to write this down, but it will serve me good memory as i read this one day. I cant really do sit-ups already.... how depressing right? You think thin people has no problems. Think again. My sister was having the best laughs for the longest time while she see me struggles to get up.

oh "IF" by bread is playing now. A room filled with music that douses me to my bed.

Good night now, dear hooey, if u ever come back into this entry 10 years down the road, remember this. life is good, you are thankful for whatever comes your way, be it good or bad.

i've also been meaning to blog about the tragic natural disaster at myanmar and chengdu. Read the papers this morning, and felt a tinge of sadness seeing those pictures of post-destruction ruins.

R______ed at 26

today is the day when i fully immersed in the line" anything is possible" in HP.

Just imagine the big guy removing the thumb tack of his wall, that little red thumb tack off his world map.

With that, everything changes overnight.

My invisible bucket list

So do you have your own bucket list?

I too, hope to leave this world one day with "my eyes closed and my heart opened".

Actually, how do you define your own bucket list? yes, i know it's alist of things you hope to accomplish before one kicks the bucket. But what kinda things?

Is it...

Things which makes u happy, or things which make others happy?

Things which u fail to do? Or things which u like to do?

Meet People whom you never met? Or people whom u cherish and cherished you?

The failure to have the "best of both worlds" and yet knowing you are going to enter another new world from your current one depicts an emotion that is both depressing and yet, inspiring.

You know you are going to die, and suddenly, things become clear. Or at least that's why it's always shown in the movies.

And because i dont know when i'm going to kick the bucket, i think it's hard for me to come up with my bucket list at this very moment. I will not know the thoughts going through my mind, unlike "Tuesdays with Morrie".

However, the show did leave me pondering. Oh, i like to highlight i watched the movie alone.On the last day of screening island wide. I wanted to catch it alone in the first place. Felt it was something i could do without falling asleep or needy of someone's sleeves beside me should i fear or tear.

I'm glad i caught the bucket list. Even tho, i did tear in the end, with strangers beside me, it was nevertheless, an experience i will remember.