The Curious Case of Life

it's break from work again as i began my Thursday, the 7th day of my 10-day forced leave regime.

So far, my days are pretty fulfilled though i had laid out plans for this week and changed them several times a day.

For today, initial plan was to go sight-seeing, nature photography in singapore, some nature reserve or rainforest. However, the weather seems really hot these days and i've barely recovered from my sun-tan (not voluntary) at Sentosa less than a week ago when i went to recee for teambuilding.

So, i woke up this morning, lazed in bed with my lib book-- a stress-free easy read chick flick book:"Remind me again why i need a man" occupying the double bed, all cosy when i tell myself to get up and start making myself a cup of coffee. No missed call from Parents so they are probably still out at breakfast and i prob gotta settle my own.

So, i made myself a cup of coffee, changed the bedsheets which my sister had repeatedly asked me to, played the album "Faith" on the compo, and started putting the bedsheets in the washer after i took out the laundry to dry.

hmm, did u realize there's "dry" in "laundry"?

Hehe, point aside, i had no idea why i started narrating my morning. It's 11.22 am and i've been asked to come to my room as my mum wanted to vaccum the living room. Yup, parents came back and bought me breakfast. They were surprised i woke up early.

So, i guess i was partly influenced by the show i caught last night with the girls, " The curious case of Benjamin Button".

There was a particular scene when Brad Pitt droned on about how, a series events caused Daisy played by Cate Blanchett to have a serious car accident, marking the end of her high-profiled dancing career.

It's alit incredible how little things which seemed so insignificant such as missing your parcel, having a quarrel with your boyfriend, forgetting to wrap a package could collaborate to amass something so huge, an energy of some sort, a collision with something bigger which end up ending someone's career, someone's life, someone's heart.

But we will never know, will we?

There isnt a benjamin button looking at us from above, narrating how the consequences of our little actions in our life each day affect someone, something else, triggering a series of event which would have alter this world today.

We can only pray to be careful and wise in our action and thoughts, we can only take so much precautions in our interactions.

I wondered if we ever have a chance in to see how our little actions has impacted our surroundings. If we will ever be given a view of that. Perhaps when we die? I wonder what i would see.

This, in a way is the mystery of life. I like to think, we never will know how great our impact stretches out. Each action, each comment you made, each interaction you had with someone, opens up another window for another. Just like a ripple in the ocean, just like a flutter of a butterfly in the amazon forest.

Just like growing old, as mentioned in the movie, you would never know much the people around you mean to you, until you watch them leave. Nothing is eternal, which makes every single moment precious.

*********

Still, i explored the concept of benjamin button's life.

How it's like to enter the world all wrinkled up, all weak and failing, all senses weak and in pain, and how's it's like to exit the world all peaceful and fresh, all young and tender, dying in the arms of your loved which you've grown to forgotten.

How heart-wrenching it must be for your loved as she watched you, not wilther, not degraded, but reborn into a young thing, becoming all childish and naughty, suffering senile demential for all enclosed in a young boy's body, with no inclinations of the past.

We briefly questioned the feasibility of benjamin button, however, as we noted with all things-- everything degrades with time, the sun does, stars glow and die out, plants grow and wilter, machines run and rust, tear and wear is evident of time, and so does man.

Is there anything that flourish with time?

Is there anything that eternalize?

As with the tower clock that runs backward, there are many events in life which i used to wish can turn back... however, i now wonder, even if i could turn back time, would i still lament it;s not good enough? would i have taken the same steps if i possess no knowledge of what i had done and the future?

Life is all about exploring, it's all about making mistakes, learning, picking yourself up, finding out more about yourself, interactions, making an impact to this world, whether you like it anot, you are making a difference just by being in it.

It's about doing the most you can, in your current physical and mental state. There's just so much time given to us before we all will go.